Thursday, October 10, 2013

Kitchen Table

Wow, it's already time to pull up a chair at the Kitchen Table again?

These weeks are going by fast!  I keep meaning to start blogging more in between, but, you know, life.  :)

So, this week's question is:  Do you attend department events?

Like Laura, my husband is both career and volunteer, so we have two departments with events to think about.

My husband attends more events than I do, but I do enjoy going with him when I'm able, depending on the event.

We've been to award ceremonies, shift parties, and weddings for his career station.  We miss a lot of those events though, simply due to our location.  We live over an hour, close to two hours away from where he works, so we have to factor in travel time, child care, gas costs, if there will be drinking and will we need a hotel, etc.  It seems like a lot of the time we'll be planning to go to an event and my husband will end up getting struck down by a migraine and we have to cancel.  No fun!

We have attended banquets, open houses, fundraisers, and parades for the volunteer station.  We also went a New Years Eve get together at the station one year.  Just my husband and I, or as a family.  We rode in a Halloween parade this past weekend.

My little Minions...  :)  Daddy was driving and not allowed to make noise with the engine, so they made their own!

There is a fire/EMS appreciation night tomorrow we may attend as a family as well, I think this is more put on through our local schools but the station will be there.  They do seem to have more events geared towards family for the volunteer station, however, there seems to be more young guys without children there... so in my (limited) experience there doesn't seem to have been as much participation in those and I will admit that's held me back from actively trying to attend's kind of awkward being the only family with little kids at something (on top of my already introverted self).  I do appreciate that they try, though!

We miss a lot of of the volunteer events because of my husband's work schedule.  Others, he attends on his own, either because we have conflicting schedules (kid's events, school, sports, etc), or simply because he needs to be able to be "on call" while he's there.  Since I don't drive, I'd be "stranded" if he left (and he would leave!).

Friday, October 4, 2013

I Definitely Too Much

Wife Behind the Fire's Kitchen Table question for the week:

Do you hang with other firefighter wives locally?  Would you like to or do you like to keep life separate?

I don't, really.  My firefighter works over an hour away, so hanging out with his coworkers' wives isn't really an option.  It makes it hard for both of us to go to all the events, ceremonies, etc, as well.  Sometimes I admit I'm a little jealous of those who live close enough to get together more often, to have formed friendships, and especially those who can just pop by the station.  I wish!

He does volunteer locally, but as I have two young children and don't drive, I haven't been able to be around the station much to get to know any of the wives/girlfriends there.  They have live-ins, so there seems to be many more girlfriends than wives anyhow, and so we're just at a different place in life.  If my hubby and I do go there together, it would mean he'd either not be able to go on a call, or my kiddos and I would be stuck at the station (though, I have to say, I hate that it seems like I might be unsupportive by not being there with him...but, I am there FOR him at home with our children).

On top of that, as I've mentioned before, I'm SHY.  I'm also a pretty textbook introvert.  Lovely combination.  I'm a watcher.  A wallflower.  I can write for days, but actually talking?  I'm not so good at.  It doesn't make any sense to me, but it is what it is.  It's not that I won't talk to you, but you will probably have to talk to me first and pull me out of my shell.  He's been at this volunteer station since 2008, and has been a career firefighter since 2009, and I've been to both stations so little that I feel awkwardly uncomfortable at any of their functions.

I would LOVE to have other wives locally to hang out with, wives who get it, who understand.  That would be amazing.  Being shy/introverted doesn't mean I'm anti-social.  I'm just...selectively social and need more downtime.  :)  I absolutely recognize that in this lifestyle you need a support system.  So, lacking the local friends, I turned to the 'net.  I've been a member of some really great groups of lovely wives, who are always just a click away.